May I have your attention please?

Brian

Brian
Joined
Feb 2, 2009
Messages
373
Y'all act like you never seen a white person before
Jaws all on the floor like Pam and Tommy just burst in the door
And started whooping her ass worse than before
They first were divorced, throwing her over furniture
It's the return of the... "Ah, wait, no way, you're kidding,
He didn't just say what I think he did, did he?"
And Dr. Dre said... nothing, you idiots!
Dr. Dre's dead, he's locked in my basement!
Feminist women love Eminem

"Slim Shady, I'm sick of him
Look at him, walking around grabbing his you-know-what
Flipping the you-know-who." "Yeah, but he's so cute though!"
Yeah, I probably got a couple of screws up in my head loose
But no worse, than what's going on in your parents' bedrooms
Sometimes, I wanna get on TV and just let loose, but can't
But it's cool for Tom Green to hump a dead moose
"My bum is on your lips, my bum is on your lips"
And if I'm lucky, you might just give it a little kiss
And that's the message that we deliver to little kids
And expect them not to know what a woman's clitoris is
Of course they gonna know what intercourse is
By the time they hit fourth grade
They got the Discovery Channel, don't they?
"We ain't nothing but mammals.." Well, some of us cannibals
Who cut other people open like cantaloupes
But if we can hump dead animals and antelopes
Then there's no reason that a man and another man can't elope
But if you feel like I feel, I got the antidote
Women wave your pantyhose, sing the chorus and it goes


'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up,
Please stand up, please stand up?


Will Smith don't gotta cuss in his raps to sell records;
Well I do, so fuck him and fuck you too!
You think I give a damn about a Grammy?
Half of you critics can't even stomach me, let alone stand me
"But Slim, what if you win, wouldn't it be weird?"
Why? So you guys could just lie to get me here?
So you can, sit me here next to Britney Spears?
Yo Shit, Christina Aguilera better switch me chairs
So I can sit next to Carson Daly and Fred Durst
And hear 'em argue over who she gave head to first
Little bitch, put me on blast on MTV
"Yeah, he's cute, but I think he's married to Kim, hee-hee!"
I should download her audio on MP3
And show the whole world how you gave Eminem VD
I'm sick of you little girl and boy groups, all you do is annoy me
So I have been sent here to destroy you
And there's a million of us just like me
Who cuss like me; who just don't give a fuck like me
Who dress like me; walk, talk and act like me
It just might be the next best thing but not quite me!


'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up,
Please stand up, please stand up?



I'm like a head trip to listen to, cause I'm only giving you
Things you joke about with your friends inside your living room
The only difference is I got the balls to say it
In front of y'all and I don't gotta be false or sugarcoated at all
I just get on the mic and spit it
And whether you like to admit it I just shit it
Better than ninety percent of you rappers out can
Then you wonder how can kids eat up these albums like Valiums
It's funny; 'cause at the rate I'm going when I'm thirty
I'll be the only person in the nursing home flirting
Pinching nurses asses when I'm jacking off with Jergens
And I'm jerking but this whole bag of Viagra isn't working
And every single person is a Slim Shady lurking
He could be working at Burger King, spitting on your onion rings
Or in the parking lot, circling
Screaming "I don't give a fuck!"
With his windows down and his system up
So, will the real Shady please stand up?
And put one of those fingers on each hand up?
And be proud to be outta your mind and outta control
And one more time, loud as you can, how does it go?
 

Fero

Old World
Staff member
Joined
May 25, 2009
Messages
9,071
Location
Civilization
inb4 TTT-racism

I remember this, haven't heard it in forever. Looked it up on youtube and like half the videos are censored. Why the fuck do you censor music? It pisses me off.
 
Last edited:

Hambone

Active member
Joined
Mar 30, 2005
Messages
334
At first I thought this was some kinda response to the whole NFL thing...than I was like okay...lemme have another beer and go slap my hoe
 

Brian

Brian
Joined
Feb 2, 2009
Messages
373
inb4 TTT-racism

I remember this, haven't heard it in forever. Looked it up on youtube and like half the videos are censored. Why the fuck do you censor music? It pisses me off.
man dont even get me started on that whole vevo shit

 
Last edited:

Fero

Old World
Staff member
Joined
May 25, 2009
Messages
9,071
Location
Civilization
It just doesn't make any sense. In 'gay bar' from Electric Six they censor the word 'nuclear'. What the hell? Do American radio and tv stations do that too?
 

Hambone

Active member
Joined
Mar 30, 2005
Messages
334
Whoa you may like penis to the butt, but I like DJ to the cut....BREAK....
 

Oli

New Member
Joined
Mar 28, 2004
Messages
9
I once sung the lyrics to "so what" by the Anti-NoWhere League in a small rural village hall; many, many years ago. It was rather amusing at the time, certainly raised an eyebrow or two with the locals.

When that song was originally released the distributer was visited by the plod who seized all copies under the "Obscene Publications Act". Obscenity my foot!

Either way, one has to try a lot harder to raise the odd eyebrow these days.
 

Oli

New Member
Joined
Mar 28, 2004
Messages
9
Yes quite alive, I have a pulse and everything (which is more than I can say for my copy of Pink Floyd's "Pulse" album with the flashing LED case- that stopped working nearly two decades ago)
 

Hambone

Active member
Joined
Mar 30, 2005
Messages
334
Y'all act like you never seen a white person before
Jaws all on the floor like Pam and Tommy just burst in the door
And started whooping her ass worse than before
They first were divorced, throwing her over furniture
It's the return of the... "Ah, wait, no way, you're kidding,
He didn't just say what I think he did, did he?"
And Dr. Dre said... nothing, you idiots!
Dr. Dre's dead, he's locked in my basement!
Feminist women love Eminem

"Slim Shady, I'm sick of him
Look at him, walking around grabbing his you-know-what
Flipping the you-know-who." "Yeah, but he's so cute though!"
Yeah, I probably got a couple of screws up in my head loose
But no worse, than what's going on in your parents' bedrooms
Sometimes, I wanna get on TV and just let loose, but can't
But it's cool for Tom Green to hump a dead moose
"My bum is on your lips, my bum is on your lips"
And if I'm lucky, you might just give it a little kiss
And that's the message that we deliver to little kids
And expect them not to know what a woman's clitoris is
Of course they gonna know what intercourse is
By the time they hit fourth grade
They got the Discovery Channel, don't they?
"We ain't nothing but mammals.." Well, some of us cannibals
Who cut other people open like cantaloupes
But if we can hump dead animals and antelopes
Then there's no reason that a man and another man can't elope
But if you feel like I feel, I got the antidote
Women wave your pantyhose, sing the chorus and it goes


'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up,
Please stand up, please stand up?


Will Smith don't gotta cuss in his raps to sell records;
Well I do, so fuck him and fuck you too!
You think I give a damn about a Grammy?
Half of you critics can't even stomach me, let alone stand me
"But Slim, what if you win, wouldn't it be weird?"
Why? So you guys could just lie to get me here?
So you can, sit me here next to Britney Spears?
Yo Shit, Christina Aguilera better switch me chairs
So I can sit next to Carson Daly and Fred Durst
And hear 'em argue over who she gave head to first
Little bitch, put me on blast on MTV
"Yeah, he's cute, but I think he's married to Kim, hee-hee!"
I should download her audio on MP3
And show the whole world how you gave Eminem VD
I'm sick of you little girl and boy groups, all you do is annoy me
So I have been sent here to destroy you
And there's a million of us just like me
Who cuss like me; who just don't give a fuck like me
Who dress like me; walk, talk and act like me
It just might be the next best thing but not quite me!


'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up,
Please stand up, please stand up?



I'm like a head trip to listen to, cause I'm only giving you
Things you joke about with your friends inside your living room
The only difference is I got the balls to say it
In front of y'all and I don't gotta be false or sugarcoated at all
I just get on the mic and spit it
And whether you like to admit it I just shit it
Better than ninety percent of you rappers out can
Then you wonder how can kids eat up these albums like Valiums
It's funny; 'cause at the rate I'm going when I'm thirty
I'll be the only person in the nursing home flirting
Pinching nurses asses when I'm jacking off with Jergens
And I'm jerking but this whole bag of Viagra isn't working
And every single person is a Slim Shady lurking
He could be working at Burger King, spitting on your onion rings
Or in the parking lot, circling
Screaming "I don't give a fuck!"
With his windows down and his system up
So, will the real Shady please stand up?
And put one of those fingers on each hand up?
And be proud to be outta your mind and outta control
And one more time, loud as you can, how does it go?
Just a too the top cuz it's good...have a nice day
 

Nocturnal

Ninja Wizard
Joined
Mar 3, 2003
Messages
1,525
Location
Tonight!
Yes quite alive, I have a pulse and everything (which is more than I can say for my copy of Pink Floyd's "Pulse" album with the flashing LED case- that stopped working nearly two decades ago)
Aw, now I has a sad. I need to call my Dad and ask him if his copy still blinks.
 
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