21 stories proving our world is going to shit

[kevinsmith]

I'm sure you good liberals on here can tell me why each of these stories played out exactly as they should. (I'm kidding, folks.)

Seriously, we really are pussyfying the world today.

Text below, but click the link for images as well.

http://distractify.com/news/how-america-is-turning-kids-into-sissies/



EDIT: No text below, click the link. In a show of irony, the forum wouldn't allow the story. Apparently too many characters might insult others.

 

[Fero]

I thought this was about when the last velociraptor died in your backyard.

 

[Nocturnal]

Sounds awesome to me.

They are gonna be spanked for saying "Shitake". Now that is some funny shit.

Paddling the school canoe? You better believe that's a paddling.

 

[Fero]

 

[Brian]

^sheeeiiittt i'd hit that

 

[Nocturnal]

^sheeeiiittt i'd hit that

Maybe before that slag got her slobber all over it.

 

[Fero]

Sorry bub, she's spoken for

 

[BigMattTheHobo]

>using single examples to make sweeping generalizations about society.

Top lel.



This article really just shows how no tolerance policies can be stupid

 

[whocares]

>using single examples to make sweeping generalizations about society.

Yeah, but you already know that that's the way he goes.


On topic:

Go here to see a fruit ninja gif:

(The forum doesn't let me post links)

 

[Nefarious]

YEAH SESISES the real sessies are the ones born in the 70s and 80s the faggot generations you look at the sessies from the 70s who go YEAH MAN SMOKE POT WOODSTOCK MAN and then the 80 loser who go YEAH BRO TOTALLY BRO FULL HOUSE YEAH BRO ID HIT THAT I mean the sessies from the 70s and 80s born in those decades are repsinsible for americas mess right now they went out spending all of the oil and starting fights with other countries in 20 YEARS WE WILL BE SAYING THE PLEDOGE OF ALLEDGIANCE TOCHINA WHILE SEWING CLOTHES FROM NORTH KOREA because of you 70s and 80s sessies so SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT THE LIBERAL FUCKING BULLSHIT OBAMA IS TRYING TO HELP OUR NATION MY PARENTS VOTED FOR HIM HES TRYING TO GIVE EVERYONE HEALTHCARE AND YOU FUCKING REPUBLICAN FAGGOTS NEED TO SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTHS AND EXCEPT OBAMA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[chalupa]

Not 100% sure you're in the right thread.

 

[Fero]

I agree with that. We are all totally faggots, bro.

And I'd hit Buffy the Vampire Slayer, not the Olsen twins.

Oh, and Sabrina the Teenage Witch.

 

[Nocturnal]

I agree with that. We are all totally faggots, bro.

And I'd hit Buffy the Vampire Slayer, not the Olsen twins.

Oh, and Sabrina the Teenage Witch.

Umm, yeah duh.

Of course Sabrina is now a fatty. Also, you would totally bang the Olsen twins don't lie. Most guys would throw the bone to just about anything from a 6 on up. At minimum you could say "I banged the Olsen twins". Plus, do you have any idea how rich they are? Between the two of them they are worth $300 Million. That's like almost 3 Chalupas or 4352 Nocturnals. Pretty good.

 

[whocares]

Umm, yeah duh.

Of course Sabrina is now a fatty. Also, you would totally bang the Olsen twins don't lie. Most guys would throw the bone to just about anything from a 6 on up. At minimum you could say "I banged the Olsen twins". Plus, do you have any idea how rich they are? Between the two of them they are worth $300 Million. That's like almost 3 Chalupas or 4352 Nocturnals. Pretty good.

Yes, but chalupa tends to loop off zeroes from his banking account... apparently he learned that on a trip to another country.

 

[Fero]

Umm, yeah duh.

Of course Sabrina is now a fatty. Also, you would totally bang the Olsen twins don't lie. Most guys would throw the bone to just about anything from a 6 on up. At minimum you could say "I banged the Olsen twins". Plus, do you have any idea how rich they are? Between the two of them they are worth $300 Million. That's like almost 3 Chalupas or 4352 Nocturnals. Pretty good.

I'm honestly not into the whole anorectic heroin whore-look.

But yeah, I'd tap them, but only if it's both of them at once and they go ass to ass with a double dildo while I choke myself.

 

[chalupa]

Yes, but chalupa tends to loop off zeroes from his banking account... apparently he learned that on a trip to another country.

No, I pick up the zeroes I find in other countries and put them on my account. Technically, I'm rich as fuck in Zimbabwe.

I'm honestly not into the whole anorectic heroin whore-look.

But yeah, I'd tap them, but only if it's both of them at once and they go ass to ass with a double dildo while I choke myself.

I'm pretty sure this is the only way it is done.